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To many people, the idea of gender transitioning might seem like a bizarre one. Most people equate gender with the biological gender that is assigned to them at the time of birth. And they pretty much think this is the norm. But there are people who do not identify with the gender assigned to them at birth. While growing up, they might begin to experience Gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria is basically a term for the feeling of acute distress caused in people when they do not identify with their birth gender. Such people are generally referred to as transgender or transsexual.

Although both the terms are often used interchangeably, there is a slight difference between the two. The term transsexual specifically refers to a person who undergoes a medical procedure to get reassigned to a different gender. That is, they undergo medical transitioning and get a new identity altogether including a new name, an i-card with their new photo, all that. So, for example, there is a person who was assigned female gender at the time of birth but they identify themselves as male. If such a person decides to undergo medical transitioning to be reassigned male gender, that person is transsexual. Transgender, on the other hand, is more of an umbrella term that includes all folks who do not quite identity with the gender assigned to them at birth time. A transgender person might also be gender fluid that is they might have a strong urge to switch from one gender to another whenever they wish. And not all transgender people who strongly identify with the other gender choose to have surgery.

There are so many stigmas attached to the transgender community in society because people see it as an aberration. And they view it as something abnormal because they don’t understand it. History tells us that something which is not understood by society is ridiculed and even censored. It is the same case with the identity of transgender people. But things are changing now. There is a lot more awareness around trans issues. So many transsexual dating sites and transgender dating websites have come up. There are specific websites for trans girl dating as well. There are online transgender forums where trans folks can interact with others like them. Societal apathy is still there but trans people have somewhat begun to get the kind of recognition and respect they deserve.

With so many free transgender dating sites, the mainstream community is certainly getting more open to the idea of accepting trans people. Unfortunately, there is a lot of violence and abuse still but things are changing.

Understanding the need for gender transitioning is very important in order to take this dialogue about trans people forward in a positive way.

There are certain aspects that need to be understood when it comes to understanding the acute need for gender transitioning in trans people.



Need for Gender Transitioning can be felt Anytime

There is no hard and fast rule for when to come out as a transgender. This totally depends on the person concerned and their particular experiences. Some people come out in their teenage years only and undergo medical transitioning quite early. There are others who might even be married and trying to lead a mainstream life. They still quite haven’t figured out the source of their distress and discomfort. And such people tend to come out as transgender quite late in life. And that is fine too.

It also depends on the family’s support to a great extent. People who are bought up in conservative families find it difficult to accept the fact that they are transgender to themselves only, leave alone the family. That is why they stay in a situation of conflict for a long time, trying to hide their real emotions and identity. It is only when it gets too much for them to handle that they come out in the open.

There are other practical considerations as well. If the family is not supportive, it is difficult to undergo medical transitioning. It is expensive and the person just might not be financially independent enough to take this decision himself.



The Person Transitioning Might or Might not Choose to Undergo Medical Procedure

This is a very important point to remember. Not all transgender people undergo medical transitioning. Some undertake Hormone Replacement Therapy and Testosterone. But they skip the top and bottom surgery altogether. There are others who skip medical procedure altogether and start coming out as their desired gender simply through dressing up and behaviour.




However, most people who come out as transgender eventually undertake some kind of medical treatment. Medical transitioning makes it easier for them to live as their desired gender in mainstream society. It is especially useful for transgender folks who are into dating heterosexual people of the opposite sex through a transgender dating app or a transgender dating site.

Transitioning is aimed at making the transgender person’s life happy and fulfilling. Many transgender people want to get their gender officially changed in their id card and official documents. This is very helpful from the point of view of living a wholesome life after assuming their new gender identity. Having your gender identity officially affirmed in your documents also saves one from potential harassment at school, workplace, etc.



Transgender People Have an Awareness of their Gender Identity from an Early Age

Well, they might not come out in the open for various reasons. Or they might just be confused about what they are feeling. Since society doesn’t quite encourage what they are feeling, it’s just perhaps difficult for them to figure out what’s going on in their head. But generally speaking, transgender people start questioning their perceived biological gender identity from a very early age.

There might be very subtle signs of their identification with the other gender when they are children. And parents might or might not notice these signs. For example, someone who is born a female biologically might be more inclined towards boy’s clothing. They might just start crying for no reason when they are decked up in girly clothes. They might just hate their long hair. All these are very subtle signs of not identifying with one’s biological gender. As a person grows up, these signs become more pronounced and a person is able to better articulate their thoughts and feelings.

But it’s not a transgender person who gets a dream all of a sudden that they want to have a different gender identity. Perceiving it like that would reflect a rather shallow and myopic understanding of trans people. In a transgender person, there are often manifestations of discomfiture with one’s biological gender identity right from childhood. If you go through a transgender blog or conversations on a transgender forum, you would well understand that. There are many stories of trans people accessible online in which they are talking about their childhood experiences.



Transitioning can help with Dating and Relationships

Medical transitioning can literally be a blessing for the romantic life of a MTF Transgender woman or a FTM Transgender guy, especially if they are into dating people of the opposite sex. It can be an immense help for those transgender people who are looking at heterosexual relationships post transitioning through a transgender dating app or a transgender dating site. Medical transitioning with the right grooming and makeup can make such a huge difference to the person’s appearance that many MTF transgender women can conveniently pass as cis women post transitioning.

In fact, these days there are many trans dating sites or transsexual dating sites where one can check out the profiles of various transgender men and women and date them. Through such sites, romantic liaisons and even serious relationships have blossomed between trans people and cis people. Medical transitioning can really help a transgender person in terms of looking for a partner. When their body image strongly conforms to their new gender identity, their level of confidence increases by multiple times. And they can be more proactive and forthcoming in the act of seeking a romantic partner.



Uncomfortable Questions about Transitioning are to be Avoided

Now, this is more for people who would like to date a transgender man or a woman. You got to realize that you are dating a person so you have to treat them like one. If you have met them through a trans dating site or a trans dating app, do not ask them uncomfortable questions about their gender identity or why they felt the need for transitioning. It is not an interview. It is a date. You are looking for a romantic partner so just get to know them as a person – their hobbies, interests and all that.

Remember transitioning is a personal choice for everyone. If you have decided to date a transgender person, you have to be prepared to respect the boundaries as well. Slowly as the relationship will develop and they feel close to you, they might share things with you on their own. Or they might not. That’s totally up to them. Gender transitioning is a very personal topic for each individual and even as a romantic partner; you cannot be too intrusive into this aspect of their life.

     

 


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