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A long-distance relationship is not for everyone. It is for those who truly believe in love and are willing to walk that extra mile for it. They are willing to even undergo physical separation from their lover for the sake of love. Relationship with a transsexual is not everyone’s cup of tea either. When you have committed yourself to dating a transsexual person, you have already signaled to the world that you are a unique person whose choices are not dictated by societal dogmas and stereotypes.


Your transsexual partner is anyways tough enough to endure a long-distance relationship. They have already won the challenging battle of coming out in the open with their identity. And transitioning is an extremely difficult phase. So, if they have come out of all that victoriously, they won’t really let distance become an issue if they are in love with someone.


You have also battled societal stigma, disapproval and outright condemnation while making the decision to date a transsexual person. So, you are a tough cookie as well. However, this does not mean that keeping a long-distance relationship is an easy deal. On the contrary, it is extremely challenging to be in a long-distance relationship with someone and keep the love alive.


Regular communication is very important for a long-distance relationship. And so are a couple of other things. This article is going to list a couple of tips that can help you keep up such a relationship. If you and your transsexual partner follow these tips, then even distance cannot be an impediment in your journey of togetherness and love!

 


Trust

 

Trust is the foundation of a long-distance relationship. Well, it is important for any relationship. But in a long-distance relationship, its importance is doubly elevated. You guys don’t stay in the same town physically. So, you have no way of really finding out what the other is doing most of the time, where are they going, who are they meeting. And you probably also have a work-life, deadlines to meet, household chores to fix. So, you cannot just leave everything aside and constantly spy on your partner through phone or social media! That would also be mentally unhealthy for you and toxic for your relationship.


Therefore, the only thing that works is trust. You have to realize that you two are together for a reason and distance is only a temporary impediment. Trust is of course not built overnight. It requires regular communication. Even though your relationship is long-distance, you have to make your partner a priority. Make sure that the two of you talk to each other almost every day even if it’s for a short while.


Just a virtual hug or kiss from your partner before you are going to sleep can go a long way towards building trust. If any of you are super busy and cannot communicate for a while due to some reasons, just tell that your partner. Communication keeps everything sorted. And lack of it creates mistrust.


If there is something about your partner’s behaviour that is bothering you and if despite all the trust, you have started doubting something, just ask them candidly. A good, honest conversation is like a stress buster and trust builder in any long-distance relationship.

 


Make Time for Each Other

 

You both are super busy. And you both have your own life, your own circle of friends wherever you live. But you have to understand that being in a relationship; you have to be each other’s priority.


So, it is very important that you create time for each other on a daily basis. Most of us spend a lot of time on social media even while we are working. So, it’s super easy to slip in flirtatious text messages to your transsexual partner once in a while even during work hours.


Get creative with your communication mode. Send each other pictures and videos from your everyday life. If you are in a restaurant having a great time with your friends, maybe you can just shoot a small video using her phone, tell your partner where you are and you are having a good time but are missing them. These small gestures go a long way towards keeping the fire in your relationship going.


Do not do everything by a plan. That can get monotonous and boring. Be unpredictable every once in a while. Send her a text or a WhatsApp message out of the blue telling her what you ate for lunch today. The idea is to be a part of each other’s immediate universe even though you are not living in the same town physically. It is certainly challenging but if you make time for each other and think of innovative and fun ways of communicating, you can do it.

 


You Have to Keep the Love Alive

 

Now, this is the point where a lot of long-distance relationships falter. Lack of physical intimacy due to the distance factor can ruin even the best of relationships. Sexual love is a basic need for everyone and if they can’t get it from their partner, they start looking elsewhere.


So, it is important that you and your transsexual partner find ways and means to keep the fire of love and passion burning despite the distance. You can consider having phone sex. Tease each other with sexy photos and messages. Phone sex can get very close and intimate if you are into it. The two of you can constantly moan and breathe erotically while you are building up the erotic crescendo over the phone. If you can actually imagine yourself getting physical with your partner while the two of you throw in graphic details of what you are doing to each other, phone sex can get very real.


Now, love surely doesn’t mean only physical love. Emotional love is very important too. In fact, in any relationship, after a point in time, emotional love is the real thing and physical love becomes an expression of your emotional intimacy with your partner.


So, it is important to keep the romance alive. Maybe, have a candlelight dinner date through a live zoom conversation! Create that mood in your apartment with beautiful lights, candles, wine and all that. Ask your partner to create a similar setting where they live. And then the two of you can have a live date. You can even try out a similar kind of live dating session from a restaurant or a café.


It’s also good to get old fashioned once in a while. That is, you can surprise your transsexual partner by sending chocolates, roses, greeting cards, flirty lingerie or whatever gifts they like once in a while.

Last but not the least, a simple ‘I Love You’ in the morning after you get up and, in the night, before you go to sleep would make your transsexual partner feel your love like you are sleeping just next to them.

 


Make Plans to Meet Each Other Once in a While Despite the Distance

 

A long-distance relationship doesn’t mean that you are constantly making love only on phone! You have to make some sort of a commitment to actually seeing each other in person even if it’s for a couple of days in 2-3 months.


And you have to make sure that when the two of you do meet each other, that time is literally reserved for your relationship. When your transsexual partner is visiting you, make the most of that visit. Even if it means going a bit out of your way and postponing all appointments, just do it. Nothing is more important in life more than a loving partner.


A couple of days of togetherness can be like a lifetime for people who are in a long-distance relationship. So, you and your transsexual partner have to make each other a priority and try and make travel plans to one another’s city if and when possible.

 


Discuss the Future of Your Relationship

 

Now, this is very important. In a long-distance relationship, you go to figure out where exactly it is going after a point in time. That is, the two of you should have a concrete roadmap for getting together at some point in time. The distance is ok at the moment but there has to be some mutual vision of the distance ending sometime in future.


Have candid discussions with your transsexual partner on a regular basis. No one wants to be enduring distance infinitely. There has to be some light at the end of the tunnel. So, the two of you have to have a concrete plan as to when and how the two of you can be together in one place. And you have to constantly discuss the progress you are making on that plan.


After all, it is for the sake of love that the two of you are putting up with a long-distance relationship. And that love has to materialize in you being physically together at some point in time.

 

 

     

 


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Relationship partners of transgender-identified individuals have distinctive couple-related experiences that are important to understanding. The “Organizational Diversity” field concentrates studies on the experiences of groups that are different from the archetypal male, white, heterosexual, cisgender, able-bodied and western worker. When analyzing the studies regarding gender relations, however, one perceives their concentration on the dynamics between men and women localized in developed western countries. Transgender persons are persons whose identity and/or gender expression differs from what is socially attributed to their bodies, breaking with the heteronormative logic.


In Brazil, where only the bodies within this discourse are legitimate, this group is systematically excluded from a myriad of spaces including the formal job market. Therefore, the experiences of these people at and with work are invisible to organizational diversity's theory and practice.



To explore this issue, this study analyses the perceptions that the transgender person maintains about their relations:


1. With their professional history


2. With other people in their work environment


3. With organizational policies and practices.


Face-to-face semi-structured interviews were made with six transgender persons that work in organizations. From these narratives, it was found that the person's level of passing usually influences their relations and that the ignorance regarding transgender permeates all three domains of relations.



The Conclusions are:


1. The relations with work are marked by opportunity restrictions


2. The relations in the job hold the person responsible for their own intelligibility and safety


3. The relations with the organization vary according to the way it faces transgenderism and its own voice systems.


Transgenders are “people whose gender identity is different from their assigned gender at birth”. Individuals who identify themselves as transgender usually seek gender reassignment treatments, which may or may not include gender reassignment surgery. Transgender women (or trans women) are people whose body is read as male and whose gender identity is a woman. They usually go through treatments to acquire characteristics typical of the female gender and adopt names, clothes, and mannerisms seen as female. A transgender man (or trans man), in turn, is one whose body is read as female and whose gender identity is a man. They seek to acquire characteristics that are typical of the male gender and use names, clothes, and mannerisms seen as male. When considering their choice of work and hiring and admission processes, the word employed most often by respondents is if they are passable, the degree to which others take a transgender person as cisgender.


In practice, the higher a transgender person is passable, the less likely they are to suffer transphobia: if one's gender expression allows them to be seen by others as cisgender, they will not be subject to the prejudice and discrimination aimed at transgender people, increasing their chances of entering and remaining in the formal labor market. Two aspects affect them being passable: one's name and one's appearance. The ignorance regarding transgender people not only permeates the relations transgender people keep with others in their work environment, but also with the organization itself. The result is that trans phobia creates and maintains difficulties for transgender people in entering and remaining in the formal labor market.

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