MelissaGirl37902
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MelissaGirl37902
| Username | MelissaGirl37902 |
| Real name | Melissa |
| I am | Trans Woman |
| Looking for | Man, Woman, Trans Woman |
| Classification | Trans Woman Non-Op |
| Age | 50 y.o. |
| Match's desired age | from 18 to 87 |
| General Description | Hi, everyone. I am a 41 year old Male to Female transgender woman. I first want to say that I'm absolutely not interested in anything sexual here. Once upon a time, while playing out my forced, male role, I was attracted to cis females only. The bitter end of an 11 year marriage... plus age... topped off with hormone replacement therapy... has rendered me asexual as of November, 2013. My ex wife was my first, and only ever, sexual partner. That intimacy brought me 2 beautiful and devoted children. I said all of that to say this. I am only... only... only... looking for friends. Male OR female. Whether male or female, I am what I recently read termed as bi-romantic. Meaning... I have zero desire for sex... and, am actually a bit repulsed by kissing. (maybe it's a psychological wall that I simply need to tear down. I just don't know.) But... I often imagine cuddling. I ache for it. Massages. Playing with each others hair. Snuggling into long, restful naps. Watching movies in bed. I have so much affection to give... and, I also need a lot of it, too. But, I honestly fear that no one is out there who would be pleased with that. A person who's cuddly and deeply affectionate, but, cannot offer anything sexually. I feel like if I had my correct female parts... maybe. Again, it may be a wall that I've put up, with the wrong parts playing a role in. Anyway... besides cuddles... here's what else I give to everyone around me. My full attention. When I'm talking to people or visiting... I either leave my phone in my apartment, or I take it with me, but it's on do not disturb, except for my 2 kids being able to get thru. Wherever possible, I do prefer the same kind of attentiveness. Kindness. By that, I mean... if we had plans for a fun evening... and, you get too sick for that... I don't berate you or say that you ruined our evening. I go into nurse mode, which is my missed calling, and feel so happy that it is me who gets to be with you in that condition, so that I have someone to take care of. Someone who needs me. I've had a lot of my family hurt me, since my divorce. I've often been made to feel like a problem, if I ever need something such as being driven to a doctor appointment. I get shunned. A lot. Not related to being trans. FOR being trans, I do get Thanksgiving and Christmas family events hidden from me. It's an unspoken rule. What I'm saying is... someone being sick or whiny or clingy for a weekend doesn't bother me. In fact, I thrive on feeling needed. I'm probably making zero sense here. LoL Loyalty. If we're put somewhere, and you encounter one of those jerk friends or relatives who puts you down or takes a joke too far and is obviously hurting your feelings... I don't betray you and join in on their side. I remain graceful, and don't get into an argument with them. But, I make it clear with my silence, and my head against your shoulder while I hold your hand... that I am NOT amused, and that I am on YOUR side. Humor. This writing cannot convey my sense of humor. But... I can assure you, I will constantly keep you laughing. In fact, I have to keep certain humor to myself, unless I find that you can be as messed up in the humor department as I am. I'm a clean person. Hygiene wise, and for how I live. I'm very moderate. I don't do any drugs. None. I rarely, rarely drink. As far as smoking... it's complicated. I mostly use a vapor pen. But, due to having anxiety disorder, I do sometimes slip and smoke real cigarettes for about a week, if stress is extremely higher than usual. Once the stress passes, I'm back to my vapor pen, and off of cigarettes for months maybe even a year. I don't keep a lingering smoky smell. I never ever wear clothes in public that I've smoked in privately. And, thanks to baking soda, it's never on my breath. I've tested even the most adamant anti-smokers who say that they'd have never known unless I'd told them. In a nutshell, I don't stink. LoL About my daily life... I'm basically trying to turn my life around. I was born and raised in Knoxville, Tennessee. Moved to Texas in 2002 to get married. My ex wife hated that I was transgender... cheated on me right after my mother died... and, threw me to the wolves. And, broke my kids hearts. I came back home to Tennessee. Since then, my kids visit me once a month, and for the entire summer each year. They want to live with me, and, I just ant them. But, the situation for that needs remedied. I was always prone to depression and anxiety. But, my mom dying, then the affair and divorce... being away from my kids... then, finally, my dog dying in February of 2014... I had a slight nervous breakdown later that Spring. I'm honestly proud of myself for still being here. It was a very dark time. Anyway... I'm currently on disability for severe depression and social anxiety. Sometimes, I'm symptom free, and go out getting groceries just like anyone else. Other days, I have such severe panic attacks that I can be in the middle of the store... have to leave my groceries and hurry back home with nausea. And, still no groceries. On my depression phases... I can sleep for days, with zero energy. I keep a tea bottle by my bed. If my depression is bad enough, I'm not even able to sit up and drink my tea. Hours turn into days. The anxiety and depression symptoms seem to disappear almost totally if someone that I trust is with me... especially my kids. One thing about my depression and anxiety... if you ridicule me for this... or tell me that it's my fault in some way... those attitudes cause me to gently and quietly exit your life. I do the best that I can, trying to heal this and get back to normal, and back out into the workforce. I don't handle ridicule on this very well. So, be very gentle in how you word things, if you try to help me about this. Honestly, what I'd most prefer when I'm not at my best...? No ridicule. No advice. No judgment. No trying to change me. What you might try, though? "Baby... you look exhausted. Have you eaten today? Do I need to make you something?" "Did you go get your groceries today? I'll go get them if ya didn't." "Do you need your back rubbed?" "Did your aunt/uncle/cousin hurt your feelings on text today, or the phone?" "If you don't feel like talking about it... come here. Let me just hold you." And, then, kiss my forehead... and, hold me... and, tell me that I'm worth loving, whether I'm at my best or my worst. I guess that's everything. Thanks for listening... I'm open to any questions, if you'd like to private message and know more about me. Tell me about you… you already know about me… |
| Marital Status | Divorced |
| Relationship | Friendship, PenPal, Marriage, Interests Share, Hang Out, Love, A Date, Long Term Relationship |
| Interests | Business Networking, Books/Discussion, Cooking, Dining out, Family, Learning, Movies, Music, Photography, Religion/Spirituality, Travel, TV, Volunteering |
| Current Employment Status | Unemployed |
| Occupation | Disabled Due to Social Anxiety |
| Religion | Christian |
| Have children | 2 |
| Want Children | Maybe |
| Living Situation | Alone |
| Language | English |
| Education | Some college |
| Income | $10,000 or less |
| Smoke | Trying to quit |
| Drink | Never |
| Drugs | I don't use drugs |
| Gambling | I don't gamble |
| Pets | No Pets |
| Sexual Orientation | Bi-Sexual |
| My Goal in Life | To be loved for my heart, and for someone to need the exact love that I was created to give to just them... |
| How Do You Swing | None of above |
| My Perfect Match | Intelligence, Humor, Empathy, Witt, Passiveness, Good Looks, Sensitivity, Thoughtfullness |
| Do You Always Pass As a Female? | I'm Always Very Femme |
| My Kind of Humor Is | Clever, Dry / Sarcastic, Friendly, Goofy, Obscure, Sadistic |
| Back in High School | Nerd, Outcast, Quiet One, Teachers Pet |
| My Social Behavior | Anti-social, Comedic, Dark, Friendly, Observant, Reserved, Shy, Strange |
| My Idea of a Great Time | Hanging Out With Friends, Going Shopping, Going to a Concert, Playing Dress-up, Playing Video Games, Reading a Book, Relaxing, Sleeping, Staying at Home, Watch Movies, Trying New Things, Watch TV |
| My Ideal of First Date | Meet... sit in the car and talk a bit before going to eat... going to eat, sitting and talking afterwards... if things go well, back to his place. No sex. Just fall asleep talking and cuddling. |
| My Friends Describe Me As Being | Friendly, Someone They Want to Be, Cool, Perfect, Goofy |
| On TV, I Always Watch | News, Cartoons, Documentaries, Dramas, Instructional, Movies, Soaps |
| My Favorite Type of Movie | Comedy, Romance, Drama, Documentary, Family, Horror |
| My Favorite Type of Music | Blues, Classical, Country, Pop, Rock |
| My Favorite Type of Book | Ancient, Auto-biography, Biography, Comic, Health, History, Horror, Instructional, Music, Mystery, Philosophy, Poetry, Romance, Supernatural, Reference, Satire |
| My Housing Situation | Friends Come Over Occasionally |
| Ethnicity | White / Caucasian |
| Height | 5'8"-5'11" (171-180cm) |
| Eye Color | Hazel |
| Hair Color | Blonde |
| Best Feature | Lips |
| Glasses or Contacts | None |
| Disabilities Conditions | Bi-polar, Mental Disability |
| My perfect match | Intelligence, Humor, Empathy, Witt, Passiveness, Good Looks, Sensitivity, Oddities, Thoughtfullness |
| My match's ethnicity | African American, White / Caucasian |
| My match's religion | No preference |
| My match's height | 5'8"-5'11" (171-180cm), 6'0"-6'3" (181-190cm) |
| My match's children | No preference |
| My match's education | No preference |
| My match's Income | No preference |
| My match's smoke | No preference, Never, Rarely, Socially, Trying to quit |
| My match's drink | No preference, Never, Rarely, Socially, Trying to quit |
| My match's body type | No preference |
| My match's hair color | No preference |
| My match's eye color | No preference |
| My perfect match is | Affectionate... can give me full attention, and won't be goofing around on their phone constantly... will love me for me... will tell me that they need me, and that I make their days happier and more complete... |
