User blogs

Tag search results for: "dating a transgender woman"
Serenity VIP

 When you start, online dating holds a lot of excitement: Here you are, on a ts dating site , about to dive into an ocean of possible matches. Especially for those who are not yet committed to any relationship that is romantic in nature, the ‘hunt’ part of online dating comes with its unique sense of thrill.

 

Too bad that for most people, connecting with potential partners via ts dating apps or platforms has its limits. Who doesn’t know the feeling when the exciting chatter with a new match or contact gives way to tedious and monotonous discussions of topics you’ve covered again and again? In case you are new to online dating, be prepared to make such experiences.

 

While chatting online with people you cannot see, communicating only via text messages and emojis, can become boring very quickly due to the nature of the conversation, another risk you face every time you open your ts dating app is the ‘what’ you talk about. Too many times, a lovely and wonderful meeting in the virtual room of a site has devolved into tedious accounts of the respective person’s day. If there were a  rewards or points program that gave you a penny each time someone asks you, after a gap in communication, “How are you?” or “How was your day?”, we would all be millionaires already. 

 

Don’t misunderstand, though: Sharing details about your day and your life has its place in online dating. How someone replies to “How was your day?” tells you a lot about what this person values in life.

Yet if they say the same thing for three days in a row, or their replies grow shorter by the minute, then you know you have hit boredom territory. 

 

Since yes, chances are high that your date or chatting partner also shares this sense of listlessness while engaging with you. If you don’t act now, you might ruin what could have been the start of a great romantic journey for yourself. Therefore, you have to ensure that you keep every online date you have as memorable and fun as possible, both for your sake and your partner’s.

 

Easier said than done, however. There is a certain degree of creativity needed in order to spice up your conversations, especially if you haven’t seen the hide nor hair of the person you are talking to. And while you might consider yourself quite the open-minded, flexible person who could excel at an improv class if these were still a thing (at least in person), you might eventually run out of ideas as well.

 

This is why we have gathered a list of tips that can help you turn those monotonous conversations into memorable and delightful moments of the budding romance.

 

 

Tips on how to get creative with trans dating online:

 

 

– Share meaningful details


When the inevitable question of “How are you?” or “How was your day?” arrives in your inbox, consider one-word replies banned for life. Think about the reasons instead:  Why do you want to say you’re fine? Why was your day just okay, as opposed to great or wonderful? Add these tidbits to your answer. Being honest will motivate your online dating partner to reply in kind.


 

– Speaking of honesty: be truthful


You signed up for this transgender dating app or this trans dating site to find a real connection and long-term romantic partnership. Leave the posing and flexing for hook-up culture. Admit to driving an ancient car because it is more fiscally responsible. Own your career trajectory, wherever it has led. Share your struggles with your identity (especially on dating sites for transgender women, men, and other folks). Only if you are honest will you find people who share your values and outlook on life, which is the basis for a successful relationship.


 

– Ask questions


Even if you are nervous or unsure if it is okay with the other person to simply pose questions, this will help get conversations going. Most people love talking about themselves, so seize that to your advantage. Think about what you would most like to know and start with that.


 

– Think of new topics to talk about


Yes, this might be a no-brainer, but all too often, online chats are centered on just telling each other what you have done for the day. If you go for this strategy every time, both you and your date are going to lose interest soon enough. So off you go! Find new topics that are interesting enough to help you talk with your date at length and with vibrancy. The first and best place to start is, of course, the other person’s profile. Check out their interests and hobbies. If none are listed, put on your detective hat and inspect the photos they uploaded. Look for the context, and ask about it.


 

– Use outside resources


Once you have exhausted the new topics you thought about, there is nothing wrong with involving outside help. This can come in the form of a fun news article or blog post that caught your eye, or simply a trailer for a new series or the announcement of a new album by a band you or your chatting partner cares about. You will be surprised how such a little gesture can bring you closer together and kick-start a passionate discussion.


 

– Expand your repertoire


As in, surprise your dates once in a while! Show them something they do not expect to see when you start the chat. It may be a video of you singing their favorite song, or a photo of your pet (or child) delivering a thoughtful or funny message. By sprinkling in surprises into your online dating chats, your potential partners will always look forward to receiving a notification that they have a new message. It might also, in turn, inspire them to reply in kind and think of surprises for you.


 

– Embrace your inner child


Not necessarily by talking about your childhood interests (although that can be a fascinating topic all on its own), but by being silly together. Yes, even when you are only conversing online you can have fun with antics and banter. You can post photos of yourself wearing crazy headpieces and costumes. You can play games as if you are together. You can compete with each other about who can tell or find the funnier jokes. Do not think that, just because finding love online is a serious topic,  that you need to stay ‘on brand’ with that tone all throughout your online dating experience.

 

– Go beyond simple chatting


Of course, you will want to limit your online dates to messaging or the occasional voice message at the beginning. Yet once you are comfortable and, most importantly, have established a foundation of trust with the other person, make use of the many opportunities that technology has already developed. Hop on a video call – or plan on for a time that fits both you and your date’s schedules – and allow your match to hear your voice and see your face. This would help you carry on conversations for a long time without becoming easily tired of having to type everything you want to say. Needless to say, this also opens up your dates to new possibilities, like a shared dinner over video chat or a game you both enjoy.

 

– Flirt!


Seriously, get that charm on and use it to your advantage. Only if that is your talent, though. Awkward moments are inevitable, but you don’t need to ask for them. As an alternative, simply be your nicest self. Respect the other person and show you appreciate them taking the time to engage with you.

 

As you can see, there are so many ways through which you can improve your experience on ts dating sites. You do not have to limit yourself just because the nature of online dating has you taking through a keyboard without a visual of the other person. Be creative and let your mind rule over your physical boundaries.

 

But hang on… how do you know what is the right strategy to use? 

 

A valid question, the answer to which depends on the respective situation. Think about how your date engages with you and determine which vibe you are getting from them. Serious or playful? Cheery or restrained? This can give you an idea of how to start being more creative with online dating. Once you have begun, do not be afraid to experiment. Try out different approaches and see how your potential partner reacts. This will help you practice, give you more insight into the person you are communicating with, and help filter out those who definitely don’t fit your expectations. 

 

And hey, if you have exhausted all options and are at the end of your list of ideas, it might be time to genuinely take the experience offline! Sure, that’s another thing that is so easily said but poses challenges when it comes to execution. But if you apply the same creativity to this step, you will certainly find a way that fits both your and your date’s lives and personalities.

 

Serenity VIP

So you’ve been active on a transgender dating site or ts dating app for a while and finally caught the eye of a trans woman. You chatted, truly enjoyed the back-and-forth, and feel a strong enough connection to take this to the next level.


Yet this is where things tend to get complicated. Online dating is already quite the challenge, but taking any relationship offline can prove daunting, no matter what gender you and your match identify as. The questions remain the same: When is the best time to suggest a real-life date, even at a safe distance if necessary? How can you be certain your potential partner feels the same? If you gathered the courage, how do you phrase your question?


Let’s assume that somehow, you did it. And congratulations, they said yes!


Now the real adventure starts. When you’re dating a transgender woman, you will face more – or rather, different – challenges on your romantic journey.


Your presence on trans dating sites indicates that you already know a bit about trans issues and the reality of transgender lives. However, if you are genuine in your interest when it comes to exploring dating a transgender woman, you will need to do your homework, as they say.


This homework includes research on several aspects of transgender life, including the harder parts and topics you, as a cis person (that is, a person who identifies with the gender they were assigned at birth), might not have on your radar yet. The lack of true and practical information, which may be difficult to come by online if you aren’t entrenched in the community, further complicates your progress.


Fortunately, you have found this guide and thus a great starting point! If you have been wondering what it would be like to date a trans woman or if you have started dating one and need a roadmap to help you navigate the dynamics, the following information will be very useful.


 

Research and Reflect


Before you begin your search for a trans woman on any transgender dating site or ts dating app, you should take a bit of time to research and understand the various aspects of the transgender community.


Topics we recommend you explore if only on the surface, include but are not limited to: 


– What does trans/transgender mean? How does it relate to the concepts of intersex or the term transvestite?


– What is the difference between sex and gender?


– What are common gender stereotypes and how does the trans community work to dismantle them? What are gender nonconforming practices?


– What legal and medical ramifications are involved in being trans? What role do hormones play? What surgery options are available, and how difficult is it to access them? Who opts for surgery and why, who decides against it?


You do not need to spend too long doing this research before you will have successfully dispelled several myths about transgender lives.


Having at least a basic understanding of these concepts and questions will lessen the burden your future partner or date will have to carry. Just like it is not on people of color to educate their white friends on the realities of racism and ‘Life While BIPOC’, do not expect trans people to enlighten you. Some might be willing to, but the onus is on you to learn.


While doing this research, you might want to reflect on your own experiences. How do you experience your gender? What shaped it? What stereotypes do you maybe harbor? How does this affect the way you approach dating?


Dating a trans woman may not fit your preconceived ideas of dating a cis woman. We assure you, however, that it will be worth the effort you invest in opening yourself up for new experiences.


 

Avoid Transgender Talk During Your Dates


While you might be curious about your date’s history or details about their life as a trans woman, never make the mistake of delving too deep into the subject of transgender. Just as curiosity killed the cat, it could also kill any relationship potential that was budding between you and a trans woman. It is possible that the subject might pop up later, but in the beginning, it is better to err on the side of caution and steer away from potentially awkward subjects. Remember that, for most people, their gender is an intimate subject, and talking about it with anyone requires trust and feeling secure in the situation.


Even if she initiates the subject at some point, we recommend proceeding carefully. Be careful of boundaries and intrusive questions. However, when she expresses willingness to talk about transgender topics and her own journey, listen keenly and without judgment. Show that you appreciate the trust she places in you and proves yourself worthy of this trust.


 

First Impression Matters


How you meet the trans woman on your first date may make or break any chances you have of a long-term romantic relationship. Since yes, first impressions matter. Beyond the way you communicate, this also holds true for attire and clothes.


While not every female-presenting person in the trans community values fashion and spends ample time on styling themselves, putting an effort into one’s appearance is a form of self-care. If we feel comfortable in our skin, we will looser and more relaxed when meeting a potential partner for the first time.


You should complement this by putting effort into your dress and maintenance. You do not need to dress up to the nines – but make choosing an outfit an active and conscious choice. Select something that reflects you and your character, don’t ‘dress up’ or pretend you are something you’re not. Natural charm goes a long way and shows your date that you are genuine in your interest.


 

Be a Gentleperson


Some transgender women enjoy presenting even more feminine than their cisgender counterparts. Other trans women may act more genderneutral or be actively nonconforming and/or fluid. Regardless of how they present, be a gentlemanly date. Not in a condescending way, but from a place of deep respect.


Whether you are a cis man or a cis woman and about to date a transgender lady, you can be courteous. Chivalry, in the sense of pulling out chairs or opening doors, might have a very positive effect on your date. However, only do this if it fits your personality and style. As with clothing, there is no need to pretend you are something you aren’t. Engage your date in meaningful conversation, truly listen when she talks, and smile so that she sees you enjoy her company.


 

Be Prepared to Talk Politics


For many people in the transgender community, politics is an important subject. The government decides who can transition from one gender to another, whether or not there are gender options outside the binary of male and female, how easy access to hormones or surgery is, and how protected we are in our everyday lives.


While ‘Keep away from politics’ may be sound dating advice for some, when it comes to being active on a ts dating site, you should be prepared to engage in political debates.


This advice ties in well with the research homework you have been given already. Unless they know someone personally, most cis people are unaware of the legal aspects and challenges of being transgender. If you educate yourself, you will certainly impress your date by showing interest and communicating that you are genuine in your pursuit of dating a transgender woman.


 

When It Comes To Sex


… be patient. Taking one’s time is a good idea regardless of gender identity, since building a long-lasting relationship depends on so much more than sex.


For some transgender women, sex can also be a difficult topic. Not every trans woman had top and bottom surgeries, so do not assume you know what your date’s body looks like underneath her clothes. Once you have built a foundation of trust and you both feel comfortable in each other’s presence, you may certainly ask your date about their sex life. Share your own experiences, if you think it might help. Showing your partner that you are open to talking about intimacy will go a long way in making her feel respected and safe.


Communication is key here – never assume anything. Many trans dating sites offer the option to specify operation status and more, yet this does not mean every person experiences this the same. The wonderful thing about human sexuality is how varied and colorful it is. Explore with curiosity and an open mind. Don’t set yourself any expectations to meet, or signal your transgender partner that there is a certain way they have to perform in order to earn your affection. 


After all, you are dating a transgender woman from a place of love, on a quest for belonging and connection. Neither one of you is in this for a quick hookup - there are other ts dating apps for that.

 

While there are certainly more tips that will help you navigate the trans dating experience, this hopefully proves a useful guide and starting point. Now off you go, be brave, and make a move!


Serenity VIP


Not everyone has the guts to date a trans woman. Most people are socially conditioned in a way that the mere idea of dating a transgender person seems like a grave transgression to them, one that they are scared of committing. Still, there are a few courageous guys out there who want to know what it is like to date a trans woman. And they begin their search for the perfect trans lady love through a transsexual dating site or a transgender dating app.

But before you begin to date a transgender woman, there are certain things that you need to get absolutely clear in your head. The image of a transgender woman that you have in your mind, courtesy of the stereotypical images portrayed in popular culture, is far from what a real trans woman is like. So, if your sole motivation to date a trans woman is the hope of a kinky affair, then don’t even bother. The purpose of her existence is not to satiate your perverted fantasies. She is a woman like any other, creating music with every footstep and love with every glance of hers.

Before you get registered on a trans dating app or a trans dating site, there is a certain code of conduct of trans girl dating that you need to be familiar with. Below are a few typical characteristics of trans women that will help you figure out how to go about dating her.



A Trans Woman is Super Gorgeous

Contrary to the strange stereotypes about trans women being manly and slovenly, a real transgender woman is actually an epitome of femininity and beauty. If you just google the term ‘trans woman’, you’d know what I mean. So, if you get into trans woman dating with this kind of laid-back mindset that you don’t need to put any effort from your side, you are in for a big shock.

A trans woman is like a true princess. She has undergone so much in life that she knows how to value herself and her wellbeing. She knows how to pamper herself and take great care of her body and mind. A trans girl has the kind of skin that can give any runaway model a run for their money. She has mastered the art of applying makeup. She knows how to dress for every occasion. And yet, her look never comes across as over the top. Her elegance is understated like that of a classy diva, who doesn’t need flashy clothes or jewellery to showcase her beauty.

So, if you want to date a transgender woman, you better be prepared for a long period of courtship because such a gorgeous woman won’t be that easily impressed!


She is Mentally Strong and Resolute

A trans woman’s life is full of stories of endless struggle. Despite all the societal disapproval and apathy, she has come out in flying colours. It is quite possible that even her family and friends deserted her at a certain point in time. So, she has literally faced everything by herself. Transitioning is not an easy job; it’s not for the weak-hearted either. It needs immense courage to come out in the open with an identity that is in stark opposition to your biological gender. But she has done it all. Only a lady with strong willpower and an independent mind can accomplish all this.

When you are dating a trans woman through a transgender dating site or a transgender dating app, you will slowly realize that you are in the company of a really inspiring person who can also motivate you to do better in life. And that’s the amazing thing about dating a trans woman. Her focus, her determination and her independent mind can teach her partner so many things about life. If you are ready to keep your ego aside and just observe, there are so many things you can learn from your beautiful trans woman.

Let’s say you had a bad day at work. Or your boss gave you some negative feedback about your work. Or in the worst-case scenario, you lost your job. You are feeling so dejected and depressed that nothing creates sense anymore. Now just imagine your trans woman, a person who is literally fighting society every minute just so that she can live out her desired identity. She is vulnerable to societal abuse on a day-to-day basis. Even when she is trying to date someone, she always has to be on her guard thinking what if this person physically attacks her for being trans. Such is the extent of transphobia even in modern-day society. Despite all this, she is dating you, helping you sort out your life and doing all this with a smile on her face. Your trans woman has a beautiful and resolute mind of her own. And the love between you two can change your life for good. 



She is a Woman like Any Other

Whether you’ve met her through a transsexual dating app or a transsexual dating app, this is the most important thing you have to keep in mind while dating a trans woman. She is a woman like any other. You cannot assume things about her just because she is trans. While dating someone, trans women like to be flattered, wooed, surprised, taken care of and respected, just like any cis woman.

When it comes to matters of physical love, they prefer getting to know you first before deciding to take the relationship to the next level. Cis guys have this assumption about transgender women that they are hypersexual creatures who won’t mind a casual encounter every now and then. Nothing can be farther from the truth. A trans woman is looking for a proper date with the possibility of a serious and long-term relationship, pretty much like any cis woman. She is not ‘available’ the way you might think she is.

In trans girl dating or trans woman dating, be prepared for a long inning. Forget all that you’ve heard about transgender women. The reality is she would want to know you more as a friend, a confidante and an interesting companion before she makes up her mind about the future of your relationship.

Just remember that she is a woman like any other. She is beautiful, sensitive, gentle and emotional. She expects her partner to woo her the good old-fashioned way and only then you can be sure of her love and trust.



A Trans Woman is Well Educated and Intellectually Strong

On average, a trans woman holds a university degree and is rather well-educated. In fact, according to research, a transgender woman is more likely to hold a college degree than your average cis woman. Although of course, finding employment remains a problem, especially in countries where the law is biased against trans people.

So, when you’ve met a transgender woman through a trans woman dating site or a transsexual dating site, keep in mind that the quality of conversation will reflect her education and intellect. You can have a great conversation with her about many topics – art, culture, literature, travel, cinema, politics, etc.

Many guys get intimidated by the idea of dating an intelligent woman. They get scared that it will be embarrassing for them if they are unable to match her intellectual standards. But if you are the type who likes an intellectual woman for a partner, a transgender woman is just the right type for you.



A Trans Woman Might Have Issues Which You Need to Understand

A trans woman is a strength and willpower personified. But she is a human being at the end of the day. Living the life of a transgender woman is like literally being in a war zone every day. You don’t know when and from where the enemy will strike because the whole society views you with hostility. The enemy could very well be lurking in your backyard. This is not exactly a comfortable space to be in. So, it is natural that once in a while, she does break down and has her moments. And at such times, she needs the support of her partner.

Her need for emotional and psychological support might even be greater if you started dating her during the transitioning period. Transitioning is a big change for her physically and mentally. And she needs your love and support to embrace that change.

Before you start dating a trans woman through a trans dating site or a transgender dating site, you got to realize that will have to stand by her through thick and thin. It’s quite different from dating a cis woman in the sense that a cis woman doesn’t have to confront society on a day-to-day basis. A transgender woman has a life full of struggles and you have to be with her in those struggles. It’s like any other relationship. You support your partner and they support you as well. Your transgender woman would help you sort out your emotional mess and motivate you to become a more positive and determined person. So, it is obvious that she expects you to be there for her when she is undergoing some problems.

     

 


Serenity VIP


You’ve been toying with the idea of dating a transsexual woman for quite some time now. And you’ve now joined a trans dating site through which you hope to meet the transsexual woman of your dreams. Well, so far so good. But what you need to realize is that you can’t expect dating a trans woman to be like dating someone from a different planet! If you think a trans woman is an exotic creature who is completely different from your average cis woman, you are totally wrong.

A transsexual woman is a woman like any other. So, when you approach her for dating, do not harbour any pre-conceived notions or popular cultural stereotypes about trans women. Just connect with her as you would with any other woman and let things flow organically. It really is as simple as that. But guys tend to make it overcomplicated when it comes to dating a transsexual woman.

So, before you start dating a trans woman you’ve met through a transsexual dating app or a transsexual dating site, you need to get some basic knowledge on what it means to be a transsexual woman. Here are a couple of points that you should keep in mind before dating a transsexual woman.



You Got to Understand What Transsexuality Is

Before you begin to date a transsexual woman through a transgender dating app or a transsexual dating site, you need to do some basic research on ‘Transsexuality’. Ignorance is certainly not bliss, especially in such a scenario. You are more prone to stereotyping people or giving them labels when you don’t have a clue about who they actually are. But once you have some kind of background, you can understand better and perhaps even empathize.

The first thing that you need to understand is that a transsexual woman is not some crazy creature who spent loads of money on medical transitioning just because she had a whim one fine day that she wants to be a woman. If you think like that, you are certainly downgrading the life struggle of transsexual people and negating their strong sense of identity.

A transsexual woman has undergone transitioning because the gender identity she belongs to in her heart happens to be different from the gender she was assigned at birth. So, it’s not a frivolous choice she is making. Being born with the wrong gender biologically has always been a source of intense trauma to her and that’s why her identity is a matter of life and death for her. Once you understand this, you’d be able to appreciate her and her life choices better.

Once you understand what transsexuality actually is, you’d be able to comprehend in totality all the struggles she has undergone and the pains she has taken to live like the woman she actually is. And when you begin dating her through a trans dating site or a trans dating app, you won’t be lost as to how you should move forward.



Dating a Transsexual Woman Does Not Make You Gay

Many cis guys are scared of dating transsexual woman thinking that they will be perceived as gay if they do that. Well, if societal perception is all you care about, don’t even bother to date her. You are certainly not up to her standards, in that case. But even for your own knowledge, you got to know that dating a trans woman doesn’t turn you gay by any stretch of the imagination.

A trans woman is a woman just like any other. When a cis guy is dating a trans woman, it’s almost like dating any other cis woman. The relationship follows the same course and patterns of courtship. There are similar rules to be followed when it comes to physical love and intimacy. So, you are dating her pretty much like you would any other woman within the normative framework of heterosexuality. The question about you being gay because you are dating a trans woman doesn’t even arise.

The question exists mostly in your mind because you are focussing too much on the word ‘trans’ and not thinking enough about her identity as a woman. Just focus on her identity as a woman and all your doubts would go away automatically.



Don’t be Obsessed with the Subject of Her Transition

You’ve been talking to her through a trans girl dating site or a trans woman dating site for quite a while now. You think it’s the right time to make the next move and ask her out for a date. She happily agrees. Now, when you meet her at a café, how do you begin the conversation? Suppose you are meeting a cis woman for a date, you would obviously start with some small talk about how the café is, how the ambience is and then move onto topics like her hobbies, interests, etc. But when you are meeting a trans woman in a café for your first date, how do you start the conversation? Do you get obsessed with the word ‘trans’ and straightaway start asking personal questions about her transition, her past life, what body parts she has? Just imagine the kind of shock she would get if you talk to her like that on your first date.

So, the point is whether it's a trans woman dating or cis woman dating, the rules are somewhat similar. You connect with your transsexual date at an individual level and not ask uncomfortable questions about her personal life. That kind of behaviour is rude, disrespectful plus it would make her feel as if you are just interested in having a good time with her physically. She would think that you don’t value her as a person.

So don’t get obsessed with the subject of her transition. If she has to tell you something about her past, she will when the right time comes. But don’t make your dates like some kind of journalistic interviews about her identity as a transsexual woman. That would make her feel uncomfortable and damage your relationship before it has even begun properly.



Be Gentle and Understanding

A transsexual woman has undergone a lot in her life. She has battled societal apathy, discrimination and outright hatred. It is possible that even her family abandoned her at such a crucial time in her life. Having endured so much, she has come out a thousand times stronger. But she is a human being, after all. There are moments when she breaks down and can’t handle it anymore. You got to comfort your transsexual woman with your gentle love and understanding during those moments.

She might sometimes have mood swings for no apparent reason. Do not judge her in those circumstances and label her a difficult woman. Just be gentle and considerate. Once you have managed to walk with her through all the thorny paths, you will meet the most beautiful, compassionate and loving woman on this planet. Just give her you're understanding and compassion and you will surely receive her love and trust.



Be Chivalrous

Chivalry never goes out of fashion. A transsexual woman is a confident woman with modern sensibilities. And yet, there is a certain old-world charm about her. Deep down in her heart, she desires a man who still has a bit of good old chivalry.

You don’t have to do anything major to catch her attention. It’s those little chivalries that matter; open the door for her, pull out that chair for her to sit, make an offer to carry her stuff if the two of you are walking and she is carrying a couple of shopping bags.

And once your relationship has reached that stage where you visit her house frequently, help her a bit with housework. Cook for her once in a while or just do the dishes and tidy up her apartment.

Your transsexual woman is fiercely independent. So, it’s not that she expects you to do anything for her. But these little acts of chivalry will make her feel that you genuinely care for her and can do anything to protect her from all harm.



Appreciate Her in a Wholesome Manner

When you’ve just started dating someone through a transsexual dating site and they happen to be gorgeous, it is obvious that you are besotted by her physical appearance. But as you get to know her better, do not restrict yourself to complimenting her only on her looks or appearance.

In fact, if you spend too much time commenting on her body, it might just backfire as your transsexual woman will think you are just interested in physical gratification. So go beyond the looks and all. Get to know her as a person and then compliment her on those other qualities. If she is amazingly well-read, praise her for that. Maybe she is someone who can hold forth a great conversation on any subject. Make it a point to compliment her on those great conversational skills. She is perhaps a great listener and gives the most accurate, well thought out advice on any given subject. Complement her on that quality of hers.

Don’t reduce your transsexual woman to a face and a body. She is an amazing personality in her own right. So, learn to appreciate her in a more wholesome way.

Transsexual women are mentally evolved creatures. Her respect and admiration for a guy would increase manifold when she sees that he is taking an interest in her mind and intellect. So, if you’ve just started dating someone through a trans girl dating site or a trans woman dating site, get to know her first. Try to strike an engaging conversation and then complement those unique personality traits of hers.

     

 


Serenity VIP

The online dating universe is full of characters. Especially when it comes to a trans woman, there are many guys out there who have a certain characteristic trait.  Whether you are registered on a transgender dating app or a transsexual dating site, you are bound to meet these types who are fascinated by the fact that you are a transgender woman.

Now, that doesn’t mean that these guys cannot be nice. Or that they necessarily have some ulterior motives. Love can be found anywhere. It comes under various disguises in the most unexpected of circumstances. And that’s the beauty of love. But when you’ve made a list of the best transgender dating sites and are about to register yourself on one, it’s best to get some insight into these typical personality types that you will definitely meet online.

Society still stereotypes transgender people. And these stereotypes are bound to reflect in the guys from that society. As a trans woman, you have to get used to the fact that your body and personality would often be seen through this biased lens. While that doesn’t mean that you write off those guys completely, it does mean that you have to be a bit on your guard while pursuing the dating business.

There are four typical personality types you’ll surely meet while dating online. Let’s have a look at them one by one.



The Curious Guy

Now, the curious guy is simply the guy who is way too curious about a transsexual woman. He has obviously never dated a trans woman before so he is just too overwhelmed by the novelty of the whole experience. When you are dating the ‘Curious Guy’, be prepared to be bombarded with a lot of questions related to your identity, your body, how you feel, what is your story and all that. Now while this kind of guy is not necessarily the wrong type, you might end up getting offended or hurt. As a trans woman, you might get put off by his lack of interest in you as an individual and his obsession with your ‘transgender identity. However, if you give him a chance and not judge him too harshly, it is quite possible that he begins to admire you as an individual and connects with you on a rather genuine level once the initial ‘curiosity’ phase is over.


Whether you’ve met him through a trans dating app or a trans girl dating site, the good thing about the curious guy is that he doesn’t have any ulterior motives. He is curious about you as a trans woman but that’s pretty much it. He is open to dating you as an individual. Once that initial ‘curiosity ‘phase is over. He might just want to date you seriously and long term.



How you deal with the curious guy depends on your comfort level. If his curiosity about your ‘trans’ status has reached such exaggerated proportions that it’s making you feel uncomfortable or offended, then you should tell him straightaway to respect some boundaries. And if he still doesn’t understand, you should just consider not dating him anymore. When you are dating someone through a transgender dating app or a transsexual dating app, it’s all about your comfort level. You don’t have to feel compelled to be nice to somebody if they are not your type.



The Experimental Guy

Now, this is the kind of guy who might have dated a transgender woman before. But he is not interested in her as an individual. It’s a kind of an experiment for him, something he indulges in to prove that he likes trying out different things. He might be a smooth operator, making you fall head over heels in love with him. He will say the right things, never offend you, and pretend to respect you. All this unfortunately has an ulterior motive. He is probably just looking for a one-night stand to satiate his experimental urge. If and when he gets that, he might just disappear.

So, whether you’ve met him through a trans woman dating site or a transsexual dating app, this is the kind of guy you have to beware of. He will be all suave and sophisticated so it might be difficult for you to find out his truth. But if you are a bit careful, you would be able to see through his shallowness.

The best way to ward off such a guy is by actually encouraging him to see you on dates without actually giving in physically. That will expose him completely. Because physical gratification is the only thing that the experimental guy is looking for so if he doesn’t get that, he will just disappear.

But as a trans woman, you have to very careful about this type of guy. He is the kind who can actually mess with your heart and ruin you emotionally. He is himself clear about the fact that he doesn’t really want to date you. You are just an object of experimentation for him. And he will deploy all his charms, niceties, everything for that experiment to succeed. Once that experiment is over, he doesn’t know you. You won’t even exist for him. So, it is very important to stay away from this type of guy.

In fact, if you are careful, you can figure out such a guy during the initial chatting phase itself. When you are talking to several guys through a transgender dating app or a transgender dating site, you can actually make out from the conversation what their real motives are.



The Trans Female Fetish Guy

This kind of guy is the most dangerous. And the unfortunate thing is he is not in minority. When a trans woman registers herself on a transgender dating site or a trans girl dating site, there is a huge probability of meeting such guys. Now, this is the kind of guy who is actually into a transgender woman. He doesn’t really want to date them and is only looking for sexual gratification. He is deeply influenced by the portrayal of trans women in popular culture and wants to have some ‘fun’ with a trans woman on those lines.

For any trans woman dating through a transsexual dating app or trans dating site, this kind of guy will probably the first to take initiative and start sending messages right away because he is desperate for some action. And the ‘Trans Female Fetish Guy’ is so dangerous because he can even harm you physically.

The good thing though is that if you are a bit careful, it’s easy to recognize this personality type. This kind of guy won’t be interested in hanging out with you at public places like cafes, bars and restaurants. Even if he does meet you at a public place on the first date, it is guaranteed that from the next time onwards, he would just want to have you guys hang out together at his place or your place. His only motive is to seduce you into getting physical with him. The trans female fetish guy doesn’t want to be seen in public with you. So, once you blatantly refuse to meet him anywhere other than a public place, he will understand that you have figured him out and will stop chasing you.

But even at a public place, you have to be super careful of this kind of guy as he can go to any extent to fulfil his ulterior motives. He might just try to place your drinks or something. So as a trans woman, whenever you date any guy even at a public place, it’s best to let a friend or family member know your location so that in case you are in trouble, they can help you.

Also, once the date is over, make sure you get back to your place on your own.  Never accept his offer to drop you home. In fact, he shouldn’t have an idea of where you live. The trans female fetish guy is the kind of guy who can stalk you and potentially harm you. So, you have to be super careful while dating this kind of guy. If your gut instinct tells you there is something fishy about this person, then just feel free to leave in the middle of the date. You don’t have to give him the benefit of doubt because your safety is what’s most important.



The Random Guy

Now, the random guy is actually full of possibilities. And he can be harmful or harmless depending on the situation. Suppose you have just joined a transgender dating site or a transgender dating app and you meet a guy who seems to be a bit too spontaneous while going about everything. He just clicks on the profiles he likes and then on the spur of a moment, sets a date with you.

For a trans woman, all this can be a bit confusing and scary. It’s possible that he hasn’t paid attention to your ‘trans’ identity. Even if you’ve categorically told him that you are a trans woman while the two of you got chatting, it’s possible that he was lost in his own world and didn’t pay attention to what you said.

Meeting such a guy is like taking a chance. It’s possible that he runs away the moment he realizes that he is dating a trans woman. But an equal possibility is that he doesn’t care too much about your ‘trans’ status and the two of you connect magically and wonderfully.

In love as in life, it’s all about taking chances. Some changes work, others don’t. But there is nothing that we know for sure unless we take a chance.

At the same time, it’s important to be careful while talking to guys through a transgender dating site or a transsexual dating app. Make it a point to communicate your trans status clearly from your side. It’s important for your safety because some guys can be terribly transphobic.

   

Serenity VIP



If you just started dating a trans woman or you just started talking on a transsexual dating site, your first conversations are very important. You will have to get to know each other and start to realize if you are meant to be together or not. This can be a lot more difficult than it actually seems. So while you start talking with your match on an MTF dating site you should think good about the topics you touch.


Don’t Go Deep


You shouldn’t go too deep in the personal life of your potential lover from the first time you interact on a trans dating website. Ask them about their hobbies and what they are looking for in a man. And decide if you can meet their expectations in an honest way.


There is so much more to a relationship than physical attraction but your intimacy will also be very important. Once you decide that you can have common hobbies, you will be able to move forward to a new level in your relationship. As long as you stay honest and you are genuinely interested in your match, you will end up with a great relationship.


Know Your Boundaries


Don’t expect too much – Think that you go on a date just to meet a new friend with only this in your mind, “Who knows? He is the one!” If you have carefully assessed that the person is not what you want then just finish the date happily without regret.


Set your time to a minimum – Don’t date the whole day. The excitement to see you again will be lost.


Leave – If your date shows rudeness to you then why continue? Walk away with head’s up high.


Enjoy the Date


In a nutshell, you need to have some knowledge about what transsexuality is before dating a transsexual woman. Some quick online research would help you have a basic understanding of what being transgender really means. When you understand certain concepts, such as gender dysphoria, you will be more than ready to date a trans woman.


Serenity VIP

There are a lot of social taboos attached to dating a transgender person. Most people, even if they are brave enough to take the plunge, get dissuaded by family and friends. But things are changing. With an exponential increasing in the number of dating sites for transgender people, the gap between the so-called cis world and trans world is closing day by day.


In this day and age, it’s not unusual to find cis men who are in a happy and stable relationship with a trans woman and vice versa. The so-called society still frowns upon the idea of dating a transgender person but the good thing is attitudes are changing and they are changing fast.


Dating a trans person is not about some instant gratification or even general curiosity. In fact, it can be a life-changing experience. Dating a trans person through a ts dating app can change your life for good. It can open up your mind to a whole new range of worldviews and perspectives. It gets you out of your little shell and makes you appreciate difference and diversity. Dating a transgender person gets one into a zone where they gradually become more accommodating, sensitive, broad-minded and empathetic. In fact, it won’t be an exaggeration to say that the whole experience makes you a better human being.


Whom you want to date is ultimately your choice and preference. But the whole point is you should not lose your eyes to an entire community of interesting people just because of some stupid social stigma. This article introduces you to a couple of points regarding how dating a transgender person can be a life-changing experience.



Trans Dating Introduces You to a Diverse Set of People


Not all dates end in relationships obviously. But the mere act of joining a trans dating site and communicating with a trans man or woman can enrich you mentally. You get to know about the issues faced by transgender community. And most importantly, you get to realize that trans people are very different from stereotypes of them portrayed by media and popular culture.


By dating a transgender man or woman, you get to appreciate them as an individual. When you chat with them online and talk about mutual likes, dislikes and interests, you realize that it’s like talking to any cis person. And that’s when you begin to get out of the societal prejudice complex against the transgender community.



Transsexual Dating Makes You a Stronger and Focussed Person


If you are a cis man dating a trans woman, you would slowly realize how much she has gone through in life. And she has still managed to pull herself together beautifully. Her charm and energy are infectious. She always motivates you to do better in life. Looking at her beautiful face and going by her magical laughter, you cannot even begin to imagine there is so much pain hidden underneath.


In comparison to her life trajectory, your own woes and worries will seem miniscule. And yet, you fret and fume and worry so much about things like a bad day at work, missing a job promotion or missing the deadline for applying for that dream job. On the contrary, she is an individual who has literally undergone hell in order to live out the life she wants to. And at every step, she has faced societal abuse and discrimination. Her own friends and family might have deserted her at some point in time. And still, she is not broken.  She has childlike enthusiasm about everything and lights up your life.


Being with a trans woman is certainly going to make you a stronger and more focused person. This relationship is no ordinary one. It will give an immense boost to your personal development and your ability to chase professional goals.



You Become More Empathetic and Sensitive


Transsexual dating can make you a more empathetic and sensitive individual. When you are in a relationship with a transgender person, you have to stand up for your partner. Your friends might not like them. You family might disapprove of them. At such times, it is possible that your partner breaks down. This is when they need your unconditional mental support.


Dating a trans person makes you question a lot of things about your general behaviour with people around. When you see your partner getting hurt by the barbs of society, you remember your own inconsiderate behaviour with someone. It leads you to a process of deep self-introspection. And this is a life-changing experience.



You Get to Date Incredibly Gorgeous People!


While this might sound like a shallow reason for dating someone, it does apply. To be honest, physical attraction is the first motivation that makes us want to go out with someone in the first place. Other things are obviously important and then they follow. But what starts it all is sparks of mutual attraction.


If you are a guy dating a transgender woman, you would instantly know what I mean. A trans woman is an incrediblywell groomed creature. She takes great care of herself physically and mentally. When you meet her, she is radiant, her skin is glowing and she is dressed just right for the occasion. And yet, her beauty is effortless. She is a natural diva. The look of a trans woman would be never over the top. But you would never see her turn up slovenly for a date or for an outing.


When you are with someone who gives importance to their physical appearance, it is natural that you start taking better care of yourself too. You start exercising; you dress up more stylishly and just generally pamper yourself more. And physical appearances are not so shallow after all. People who make effort to pull themselves together externally are also more at peace internally. They have good self-esteem. Such people are also more positive. If you are slovenly and careless about your appearance, it creates a certain negative energy web around. But if you are polished and well-groomed, you exude optimism.



It Can Make You Meet Your Soulmate


Most people go through many hit and trial experiences before they find their soulmate. And many a time, people are stuck in unhappy relationships simply because they closed themselves to other possibilities. If you date someone through your circle of friends or acquaintances, your options are limited. Thus, the likelihood of meeting someone like-minded is also very low. On the contrary, if you consider joining a dating site for transgender people, it opens up a whole new world.


Love is mysterious and unpredictable. It doesn’t follow a straightforward logic that if you are a cis guy, you would only fall in love with a cis woman. No, you can fall in love with anyone irrespective of whether they are straight or trans. And that is the beauty of love. You have more chances of finding your soulmate if you don’t restrict your dating preferences by a rigid criteria.


Dating a trans man or a woman doesn’t always have to be viewed through the lens of their gender identity. That is just an aspect of their life. They are unique, wonderful individuals like any other. So if you approach them with an open mind minus all that baggage, it will be a wonderful experience. And who knows, you might just end up meeting your soulmate!



Trans Dating Can Make You a Better Person


This is the best thing about dating a transgender person. The whole experience can make you a better person. In the long term, it increases your awareness of the issues surrounding the LGBT community in general.  As you connect with your partner and their worldview, you will notice that there is a whole new world out there that needs to be understood and embraced.


You might even get involved with the cause of rights and issues of the transgender community and communicate their viewpoint to the world at large. Or you might choose not to get involved in the issue at a larger political or social level. But with a trans partner by your side, you certainly cannot keep yourself insulated from the issues and things that affect your partner’s life.


We all strive to become better person throughout our life. But not all of us get the opportunity. As they say, in order to evolve as a human being, one needs to go through a lot of grinds. Here you are lucky to not go through the grind yourself but to learn from the experiences of a partner who has faced a lot. And you stand with him or her in their personal battle; it also increases your social awareness manifold. You are not the same person anymore. You begin to observe things around you more closely and general issues like inequality and marginalization have a way more profound effect on you than they used to. All this is certainly great news for your personal journey as an individual. 


Serenity VIP

Dating someone is one of the most beautiful experiences of life. We look forward to waking up, taking care of ourselves, and take on the day with an infectiously positive spirit. Our lives are perhaps incomplete without the admiration and approval of someone we have a crush on. While it’s important to not have your self-worth depend on someone else’s opinions, we are human after all. Having someone we like notice us back makes the day worth it.


Dating as a transgender has become relatively easier now. You don’t have to meet someone through friends and acquaintances to get a prospective date. There are so many dating sites and apps for transgender people. At the mere click of a mouse, you can start communicating with potential love interests. And then at some point of time, you can set up a real date with someone you are getting along well with.


When that girl or boy of your dreams finally says yes to a date, it’s easy to be super euphoric and get carried away! While you deserve every bit of that happiness and adrenalin rush, it’s important to keep some things in mind in order to make that first date special. There is no manual really but still, there are certain rules and laws of dating behaviour and etiquette that you should follow.

 

This article tells you about a few tips that you should follow while dating as a transgender person.



Make Sure Your Date Knows You Are Transgender Woman


This is most important. Make sure your date knows in advance that you are a transgender person. If you are dating through a trans dating site, they would probably know anyways. But a lot of trans people also date through regular dating sites. On these forums, it is sometimes difficult for the other person to figure out your identity unless you tell them categorically. So make it a point to tell them that you are transgender before you even start talking online.


Some trans people think that revealing their identity early on might prejudice someone against dating them. So they keep it a secret, waiting for the right time. But that’s not a fair approach. Your potential partner has every right to know about your identity. This kind of gamble is also not healthy for your dating scenario. The world is full of transphobic people. Even if you get along really well with someone, their behaviour might totally change once they know that you are transgender. It’s also putting your personal safety at risk. You don’t want to be harassed and abused by someone you meet for a date. So before you plan a date with someone, make sure they know that you are transgender.


Only when you are certain that they don’t have any issue with your identity, should you go ahead with seeing them on a date.



Have Positive Vibes


When you are meeting someone for the first time, it’s important to be pleasant and cheerful. You don’t know how it’s going to be. They don’t know how it will turn out. What matters is the moment. Just enjoy your date, be happy and make it pleasant for them as well.


Meeting someone in real life is totally different from chatting with them through a transsexual dating app. So just be your natural self and go with the flow. There is nothing as irresistible as natural chemistry built over real life meetings. It’s the kind of chemistry that gives you goosebumps and butterflies in the stomach. Maybe, you develop that equation with your date. Maybe, you don’t. There is no way to know in advance. So just relax and be comfortable.


Also, remember to smile! It can really make the other person’s day and put them at ease. Meeting your potential boyfriend or girlfriend with a frown on your face is not exactly the stuff of dreams. So wear that infectious smile and your date will be certainly drawn to your aura.



Communicate With Confidence


Great communication skills are an asset for anyone. The art of having a good conversation becomes especially useful during a date. Think of topics that are mutually interesting and then weave a conversation around those. Do not jump from one topic to another at your whim. Some of us have a habit of getting carried away when we talk, so much so that we completely forget the other person and just go on ranting. Don’t do that on a date!


That’s why it’s important to be a good listener. In fact, listening is a part of great communication skills. Listen with interest whatever your date is saying and then take the conversation from there. This will make the conversation interesting and also help build chemistry between the two of you.


When you are talking to each other, just think you are friends. That would make the whole thing easier. If we are too conscious about the dating thing all the time, it can hamper our ease and confidence. So just relax and have a chat around topics you are passionate about.



Don’t Expect Too Much


Do not expect a Romeo and Juliet kind of love story on the first date itself. Just take it easy. The first time you are meeting someone, it’s more like meeting a friend. Only when you get comfortable with someone and can have a decent conversation with them, you can begin to think about other things. So have realistic expectations from your date. Don’t expect them to fall head over heels in love with you. That’s probably not going to happen. If the two of you feel interested enough in each other after the date to meet a second time, that’s probably the best you can achieve.


It is also possible that the date is not going on that well and you’ve realized that. Still, it’s important to just stay cool and be civil. It’s not the end of your life. Enjoy the moment while you are there and then just coolly walk your way. However, there are certain places where you have to draw some boundaries. If your date is rude to you, it’s time to just walk away without a word. Do not get into arguments because that’s just going to create a scene. Just coolly walk off.


Expectations ruin the best of things. So even if your date has ended rather well, do not expect too much. If you will be seeing your potential love interest for a second time, look forward to it. But don’t make it the sole motto of your life. Concentrate on other things and be just cool and calm.



Know the Basics of Dating Etiquette


There are some basics of dating etiquette that you got to follow. These are fairly general and pretty obvious things that we often tend to overlook. When are dating someone in a restaurant or a café, do not go on a complaining spree. There are people to tend to find a fault with something everywhere they go. The food is not good, the service is bad, you don’t like the décor of the restaurants, stay away from all those irrational and irritating complaints.


Complaining incessantly about a restaurant’s staff or service during a date is just going to ruin your date. It will give your partner the impression that you are a grumpy and bad-tempered person. So do not indulge in that kind of drama.


Another important thing to remember is that you shouldn’t be over open and trustworthy during your date. Some people have a habit of getting so worked up that they confess everything about themselves to the other person during the first meeting itself. Do not do that. Be a bit secretive and mysterious. Be candid about your conversation but do not reveal too much about your personal life. Keep the talk centered on topics of general interest. Do not approach subjects too personal or controversial. It’s a good practice to refrain from revealing too much about your past relationships. You shouldn’t ask your date probing questions about their personal life as well.


When you are meeting someone for the first time, never ever start talking about the subject of physical love. That will just freak out your date and they will probably think you’re just desperate to get laid. Keep all that stuff for later on. During the first date, just keep it old-fashioned, classic, and simple.


The dating etiquette code equally applies to the other person. If they ask you too many inappropriate questions about your transgender identity, just tell them politely but firmly that they need to maintain certain boundaries. If you feel vulnerable at any point of time, feel free to just walk away. If at any point during the date, you feel that the other person is not sure about your transgender identity, just tell them categorically again. Even if you have communicated it before, there is no harm in telling again. This is the most crucial aspect of your relationship. Your partner has to be comfortable with your identity.


Serenity VIP

Now that you’ve met the transgender woman of your dreams, the next move should be to ask her out on a date. When she says yes, you are obviously on cloud nine! So it’s easy to get carried away and ignore the actual practical part which is planning the date. But that will be a sure-shot route to ruining the whole thing. The future course of your relationship depends on that elusive first date. So it is important you spend a considerable amount of time and energy planning it out.


As the adage goes, the first impression is the last impression. In order to woo the transgender woman of your dreams, it is important that everything about the first date is in sync with her personality and sensibilities. Each individual is unique so you cannot have a generic date plan for every situation. You got to do a bit of homework and come up with something that strikes your trans woman as interesting and fun.


You might even be nervous and jittery thinking what if she gets bored on the date. It is obvious to have those mixed feelings when you are embarking on something new. But there is no need to panic. Planning an awesome first date is no rocket science either. You just got to be a bit smart, innovative, and creative.


This article gives you a couple of tips that would help you in planning that great first date with the trans woman of your dreams.



Come Up With Several Options for the Date Venue


This is important. A date is about two people. So you can’t just announce to your transgender woman that you’ve booked so and so place and that’s where you got to go. You have to give her a couple of options to choose from. And that’s why planning in advance is necessary.


Obviously, it’s not possible to have an unlimited number of options so 3 is a reasonable number. Give her at least 3 options to choose from. No matter how well you’ve figured her out, you can never be sure about someone, especially when you haven’t ever met them in person before. That is another reason why having a couple of options for your date venue is important.


It will also give her the impression that you genuinely care about her likes and dislikes. It is obvious that when you meet someone through a trans girl dating site and have just communicated with them online, there are some doubts and hesitations on both sides. That is why it’s important to go slow and take the preferences of your trans woman into consideration.


It’s best to go for venues that are relatively near to wherever she stays so that she feels safe getting back home. On the first date, she might not trust you enough to drop her back home even if you make the offer with all good intentions. Therefore, it’s important that the date venue is somewhere close to her residence so that she can get back safely by herself as well.



Take Her Personality into Account While Deciding the Date Venue


The best rule to follow is to have three options in hand – one with a classic and neutral date venue and two others that are customized to suit your trans woman’s personality and hobbies.


If you are going out on a date with her, it’s obvious that you two have been chatting for a while through a trans dating site. So you must have figured out something about her likes and dislikes. Is she a rock music girl? Or is she someone who would enjoy a date at an artsy café or bar with some jazz in the background? You got to figure these things out. Maybe, she is not that much into music at all. Perhaps, she enjoys outdoor adventure more. In that case, you might have to plan out a different kind of date for her altogether.


When you tell her about a date plan that’s totally custom-made according to her aura and persona, she would really appreciate it. Your transgender woman would obviously notice that you haven’t just given her a list of stock venues to choose from. On the contrary, you made a great effort to figure out her vibes and plan accordingly.


It’s best to keep one option classic and safe just in case she wants to keep it conventional and low-key since it’s your first date. Whichever option she chooses, but she will certainly notice and admire your initiative in figuring her out and planning a date accordingly.



Keep Your Budget in Mind While Planning the Date


When we are trying to impress someone, it’s easy to go overboard and spend beyond our means. Resist that temptation. If a girl falls in love with you, it’s not for your money or the expensive places you take her out to. It’s for your personality, charm, and sincerity. So when planning out that first date with the trans woman of your dreams, make sure you stay within your budget.


It’s very much possible to have a great date even within a limited budget. You just need to be a good planner. Check out various deals and discounts being offered at several restaurants and then choose some options accordingly. It’s very important that you are comfortable with the prices of the place you choose since you got to bear all the expenses yourself. As a rule of thumb, you pay for the first date, and then for the subsequent dates, you and your partner can split the bill.


Once you reach a certain comfort level with your trans girl, you can tell her your concerns without any hesitation or embarrassment. You can confide in her that your budget is a bit limited. She would not take this against you. On the contrary, she would appreciate that you trust her enough to share such an important detail of your life with her. Being open and honest with one another is the basic foundation of any relationship. To begin your first date on that note.



Remember Your Online Chats with Her


Now that the planning part is over, it is very important to figure out how to behave during your first date. Obviously, you try and strike a great conversation.  Starting though is the tricky part since the two of you have only spoken through a ts dating app and are meeting for the first time. A golden rule to follow is to remember all your previous chats with her and initiate a conversation accordingly.


Even if you had been talking only through texting till now, there is a certain rapport you’ve built. So take it forward from there. Remember any specific comment she made about something in one of your chats and bring that up. Tell her how that made you think about a particular subject. The safest way to start a conversation is to talk about general things like hobbies and interests. Everybody likes movies and music to a certain degree. So you could talk about that as well.


Real-life chemistry is obviously very different from talking to someone online.  A lot of it is destiny really. It can be like fireworks or go totally cold. But remembering your online chats with your trans woman is a good place to start. Once the initial awkward phase is over, your natural chemistry will come into play. But to begin a conversation, you got to start from somewhere.



Ask Her Out On a Second Date


If it all goes well and the two of you are having an awesome time on your first date, it’s time to ask her out for a second one. If she had a good time with you, there is no reason really why she would say no. But it’s important to make that second date offer right there and then when you are out with her because if you leave it for later on, she might think through it and change her decision. And you don’t want that to happen!


When you are in the flow of things and there is some chemistry building up between the two of you, that’s the best time to ask her if she would like to see you again. And once she says yes, you would have a brand new date to plan and look forward to!



Ask Her to Text When She Reaches Home


For a woman, it’s very important that you are concerned about her safety and well-being. You might be the best-looking and charming guy in the world but all that doesn’t amount to anything for her unless you are considerate and caring. Make sure that once the date is over, you ask your trans woman to text you once she gets back home.


If she forgets to text you for some reason, take the initiative to text her or call. That would make her feel that you genuinely care for her. 

Serenity VIP

When you’ve finally made peace with your identity and are ready to come out in the open as a trans woman, it’s a special moment of your life. You feel exhilarated and happy. But there still might be certain things bothering you. If you have a female partner who doesn’t know about your real identity, this can become a great source of stress. You have spent a considerable portion of your life with them. So they mean a lot to you. You definitely want to embark on your new journey but you don’t want to hurt them in the process. As a trans woman, you want your female partner to be a part of that journey. While this isn’t easy, it certainly is not impossible.


People who really love us do so unconditionally. It’s not just for looks or not even for our gender. When a relationship reaches a certain point, our partner begins to love us unconditionally. A sudden change in our life path might unnerve them but they will certainly walk with us through thick and thin. At the same time, a lot of understanding is also required on your part as a trans woman that this isn’t easy for your partner. The entire dynamics of your relationship will change. You will still be close but in different ways. So she will take her own time to digest all this. And you need to give her that time and space.


Coming out in the open as a trans woman is not the end of story for your relationship with another woman. Irrespective of whatever circumstances under which that relationship was forged, it has now become an integral part of your life. Your being a trans woman won’t make your love for your girlfriend or wife any less. So it’s important to be honest with them and not hide things. That is the first step towards reinventing your relationship while embracing your identity.


It can all seem baffling. But you can certainly save your relationship with a female partner after you’ve come out as a trans woman. This article tells you a couple of ways in which you can do so.



Give Her Time to Adjust to Your New Reality


You cannot suddenly announce to your woman that you are transgender. You need to do this slowly and gently. You can’t just bombard her with the news on the spur of a moment. You got to prepare the ground first and then slowly break the news. She might just not accept it at first but don’t lose all calm and panic. Give her time and her acceptance will come by.


The point is to be gentle, sensitive, and tactful. Remember it’s not just about you. It’s also about her life. This entails a big change in her personal life as well so she has got every right to take some time and think through things.


You should slowly start sharing your feminine side with her. First, she might feel awkward but then she would get used to it. If she gets upset or mad at your revelation, just don’t bring it up again for some time. Once you feel that she is in a better zone, things can be discussed again.


When you start dating someone, you don’t tell all about yourself in one go. You go step by step. It’s the same with communicating your identity to your wife or girlfriend. You have to work on it over a period of time. It just can’t happen overnight. If you are too hasty and impatient, you might just end up prejudicing them against you forever. And you don’t want that.



Assure Her of Your Love Repeatedly


When you communicate the truth of your identity to your wife or girlfriend, she might just feel betrayed. This is a natural thing to happen. So take time out to appreciate her and tell her how much you love her. This will reassure her of your unwavering commitment and sincerity, no matter what.


Take time out to express gratitude for how she has changed your life for the better. Remember the best of her qualities and remind her of those every now and then. When your partner sees how much you love and adore them, all their fears and insecurities will melt. And they will understand that your relationship is rock solid and nothing can come between the two of you.


Tell her that she will be the first one to know everything that’s happening in your life. There are no secrets between lovers. Assure her of that.



Do Not Freak Out if She Gets Uncomfortable


A relationship is always about two people. You might feel that you are the center of the world and there is nothing greater than your problems or issues. But that’s simply not true. For your wife or girlfriend, her concerns are very important and you have to respect that. Once you’ve communicated to her your identity, she might get uncomfortable around you.


It’s possible that she avoids you, doesn’t want to talk and withdraws into her own space. Do not judge her for that. Focus instead on how to positively deal with the situation. Try getting her involved in activities that the two of you enjoy like playing some sport together or watching a movie. Try to bond with her as usual and things will work out.


Above all, be patient. It’s a big change for her so she will get uncomfortable at times. Understand that and be empathetic.



Start Opening Up to Her Once She Has Fully Accepted You


Once your wife or girlfriend has fully accepted your identity, it’s time to open up about your new self. As a transgender woman, your personal life is going to be a certain way. You want to revel in your feminine side and are perhaps even considering medical treatment to develop the physical characteristics of the female gender. Whatever it is now is the time to start opening up to your partner. Once you feel she has really accepted you for good, start sharing all your deepest desires and plans for the future with her. Share your insecurities and fears too. This would make her feel special and valued as a partner since you are making her a witness to the deepest emotions of your heart.


Maybe, you want to join a transgender dating site and start meeting people. Communicate this to your partner. If she is uncomfortable with the idea, then just drop it for a while. Once you bring it up again, assure her that you are only looking for friendship, that you won’t go for anything sexual.


It’s a tough call. As a transgender woman, you might be tempted to get into a fling with a guy you met through a ts dating app. There is nothing wrong with it if your female partner is open-minded enough to accept this kind of liaison. But if they are not, then you have to observe restraint. At the end of the day, it’s all about your priorities. If saving your relationship is important for you, then you got to keep some boundaries. Communicate your needs and wants to her but also take her feelings into account.



Start Bonding With Her As a Woman


This might be difficult. She started dating you from a heterosexual perspective so she might not even be comfortable with that kind of equation. But if you think she has accepted your identity, there is no harm in trying. Try to develop your mutual chemistry as a woman. Bond with her over girly activities like trying out a new makeup look or hairstyle. Go to the salon together to get yourselves pampered with a manicure, pedicure, or hair spa. Or give each other a relaxing pedicure at home. This is a great way to initiate female bonding.


Go for ingredient shopping together and then try out new homemade skincare routines together. Again, all this is not as easy as it sounds because she is used to looking at you in a different way altogether. So go slow and gentle. But once she starts bonding with you as a woman, a different kind of chemistry will come into play which will be nurturing and therapeutic for your relationship.



Encourage Her to Increase Her Awareness on Trans Issues


Encourage your partner to learn more about transgender individuals. She could go through a transgender blog or read other material available online regarding the transgender community. She could also join a dating site meant for transgender people and communicate with trans individuals.


Once your partner gets to know more about transgender people, her prejudices would automatically meltdown. She would understand and appreciate your struggles better. Your girlfriend or wife would then view everything from the right perspective. She would no longer blame you for keeping her in the dark for long because she now understands that it’s not something in your control.


This is the best way forward for your relationship. Encourage her to understand the issues surrounding trans people and be vocal about these. Once she truly comprehends your life journey, she will support you with all her heart and soul.

Pages: Previous 1 2 3 Next
Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.